Accountability: Aaron’s Story

Accountability: Aaron’s Story

Written on April 16th, 2014 in Stories by Aaron Sanborn

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Change Was Needed. Change Was Found In Accountability

It is difficult to explain in words the amazing changes that X3watch accountability has had on my struggle with sexual addiction, and the strength it has given me, but I will do my best. I’ve struggled with sexual addiction for over 20 years now and I’ve tried many different avenues to conquer it: groups, accountability partners, etc… and nothing ever stuck for long. X3watch changed the game because it brought to light, in real time, my dark secrets.

When someone you choose can view where you have and have not been on the internet, when the choices you’ve made can be seen by others, when alarms are set off by blocked content and inappropriate pages, then your actions are no longer your own secrets. X3watch does this, keeping me in check because I know I am no longer the only one who can see where my eyes have been. It is also extremely helpful that it blocks unsavory sites that are dangerous to me and my road to sobriety.

Now that I no longer engage in this behavior, I’ve slowly begun to put my life back together. My wife is beginning to trust me again, my marriage has become much more intimate and loving since I have left the lies and guilt behind, and I no longer make excuses when I do make a bad decision. I have become a different man, stronger now that I am no longer weighed down with guilt and drowning myself in self-destructive porn. I see life anew; I see the small joys that have passed me by for so long.

I’m now a year into this program and have moved past the beginning stages of recovery and into a lifestyle of sobriety. Like an alcoholic never stops being an alcoholic, the temptation and struggle of sexual addiction will always be waiting to show its ugly face again, and I need to live every day vigilant in keeping my guard up against this evil. In my new life of sobriety I think of my future responsibilities, showing my children one day what it means to live as a man of God and integrity. Now, I will be able to look my son in the face one day and help him navigate these murky waters with a clean conscious and a clear mind to help him never repeat my mistakes. Among all the blessings this program has provided me, that is at the top of the list.

X3watch gave me an avenue to stay accountable at all times and took away my excuses to continue living out my addictions in secret. Without this consistent accountability, I don’t know if I would have ever had the strength to lay down my old ways. I am forever grateful to XXXchurch and this program that has helped change my life.

 

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